Friendships

The last couple days I've really been thinking about the friendships I have, the friendships that have died out, the friendships that are just beginning, and the friendship I ultimately have with myself.  


So let's start off from the beginning -- and be honest with the world.  I came home Friday afternoon after a ridiculously hectic, chaotic, and mildly stressful day at work.  Now mind you I love coming home, especially when my wonderful husband is home (likely the last Friday night he'll be completely free....).  But here's where it started to go downhill....  After eating dinner I found myself sitting on my couch (much like I am now) and it was like a wave of loser-dom came over me.  Honestly felt like a slug to the gut of self loathing.  It was likely rooted in my exhaustion from the day -- but hey, it sucked no matter how you looked at it.  Anyway I felt like a bum -- all my buddies were off either meeting together, or out doing "fun" things.  It was ridiculous to have spent any amount of time self loathing.  I was able to just voice it to Isaac, be honest about the little voice that was whispering in my ear.  And to be honest, it felt like a weight was lifted.  I brought that ugly voice in to the light & with Isaac's help & support I was able to see it for what it was -- a cheap lie Satan was trying to sell me.  Had I been by myself I likely would have bought in to it completely.  Bless Isaac and his kindness.


The rest of the weekend was spent experiencing those other three parts of the friendship wheel.  I had to spend time with a person who used to be a dear friend of ours.  But over the course of the past two years has drifted, and our friendship with him has drastically changed.  Which has sucked.  But to back up to that I was able to do something good for my best friend Monique.  I'll have to share at a later date :)  But it's good -- and one of those things that make you warm inside thinking about the goodness and happiness it'll bring to her & her hubby.  Love it.


All this to say that friendships are fluid things.  There's nothing stagnant or necessarily permanent about friendships.  They're always changing, growing, being shaped by shared experiences, and deepening.  It's a gift to have a friend -- but a bigger gift to be a friend.


<3
Weight Loss Weigh In: 157.4 (down 1.6lbs from last week!) HUZZAH!