Realization #5

Jeeze -- this must be the season for personal revelations?!  I will from here on out create a label to be associated with all my realizations.

Here it goes...Realization #5:  Sometimes I can just be a big ol' brat!  That's right, I said it. 
My name is Anna, and from time to time I am a brat for little to no reason.  *Phew...not as hard as I thought it would be!* 
Last night was a perfect example of my sinful, selfish bratty-ness rearing it's ever so ugly head!  It's football season & school just started, which typically means late nights for Isaac, particularly on Sundays (they have football meetings in the afternoon which lead in to school work afterwards).  This I know; logically I am aware of this.  Yet for some reason yesterday I was so upset with him when he got home at 9pm -- even though we didnt' have concrete plans, there wasn't some place we had to be, he hadn't said that he'd be home at 6:30, or anything of the sort.  The only thing I had to legitimately stand on was that I think he should have just shot a text with a general at home time.  Beyond this...I had nothing but quicksand beneath my feet.
It was the oddest evening - Isaac feeling bad, me feeling mad then bad then mad again...mad at myself, mad at Isaac, just mad in general.  Not that it's any excuse I was exhausted from the whole week at work and organizing/hosting a bachelorette party....needless to say, I was pooped.  That aside I was just pissed.  Have you ever been in that place where you're not entirely sure why you're mad; but completely sure of the fact that you want to be mad?  That's me -- or was me last night.

So today I feel awful.  Completely wretched.  What a lame-o wife am I?! I am married to one of the sweestest men alive who lives and breathes to be a loving, caring, successful husband who strives to make everyone around him proud.  And here I was throwing it in his face and effectively throwing a useless, pointless tantrum.  Yuck - don't even like myself about that right now!

Now comes the time to apologize and confess my bratty-ness to Isaac.  And time to be incredibly thankful and keenly aware of his sacrifices for our family.  He's wonderful - and a lot of the time I'm surprised he picked me.
<3